I had lot of fun taking this picture and visiting this place. Lovely waterfall in the Alps. A via ferrata behind it. I was charmed.
Did I achieve a zen mind meditating on this big rock there? No. But just being in this place? Definitely. It was pure awe and joy for me. Can one feel rejected while hearing “no” in such a place? Or, better question: Can one feel rejected when one hears “no” while feeling ecstatic and happy? No.
Collect good moments. Cherish them. Find ways to recharge and bring balance to your emotional state. Being in nature for many of us would be for sure a safe bet. And when you have something that belongs to you and no one can take it away from you. When your source of happiness is not dependent on other people and their decisions or words. It is very soothing. Because later, when you are back in your everyday life, you will get rejected. You know that it is just a matter of some time, and you will be again in your place, doing your thing and being happy without any big reason. Simply being happy because of You.
I. Shifting your perspective on rejection:
1. Rejection is normal: It is not rejection itself but the fear of rejection that blocks you.
2. Rejection isn’t failure: A “no” doesn’t mean you’re a failure. It is just a feedback. There are some hidden reasons in the mind of a rejector (some reasonable and some very subjective that you can influence with Sleight of Mouth). Rejection rarely says anything about you. Usually, it says a lot about the rejector (their life situation, current feelings, beliefs and opinions). → Hunt for C=›E=M!
3. Rejection is an opportunity: Rejection can provide valuable feedback and open doors to unexpected possibilities. The best things we crave are usually in the Challenge Zone.
II. Embracing rejection through action:
4. Seek out rejection: Although using → Sleight of Mouth and creating Cheat Sheets for most common rejections is an efficient method of handling rejections, the behavioural aspect (desensitization) and growing experience are also important.
5. Ask for what you want: Don’t hold back from asking for opportunities or help due to fear. The worst that can happen is a “no,” but the best could be life-changing. Remember, when you stand in the water, you especially feel the resistance when you walk through it. Moving forward generates situations when you can get rejected. If you are not rejected from time to time, it means you are not moving forward.
6. Focus on the journey: Learn to enjoy the process of asking and putting yourself out there, regardless of the outcome. This thrill means you are alive.
III. Building resilience and self-acceptance:
7. Own your worth: Internal validation, not external approval, is key. Base your confidence on your skills and experiences. Learn how to communicate in different social situations and let your confidence rise in a healthy way (→ Book: ”DSR: Relationship Communication”).
8. Learn from rejection: Analyze why you were rejected and use it to improve your approach next time. → DSR Four Phases of Handling the Rejection is here crucial.
9. Develop resilience: The more you experience rejection, the less daunting it becomes. You’ll build the strength to bounce back and keep going.
Inspired by Jia Jiang’s “Rejection Proof”
